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The Adventures of My Past

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November 29th, 2005

(no subject)

ok so ive started work again and im working 830pm to 5am. its kicking my ass. my parents watch aiva while im at work and my mom tries to let me sleep when shes at home because she knows i get very little. i come home and take a shower and by that time aivas awake and wanting to eat and stuff. so i normally dont get to sleep until like 8am. then its about every 2-3 hours for a half hour to an hour from then on until i go to work. im off today and was yesterday too, so ive had a little more chances to catch up on sleep THANK GOD. the people i work with are fucking lazy asses and never want to do anything. i ended up doing the majority of the...well bitch work on saturday and wasnt very happy about it. but i said i was going to be nice to everyone and be patient with all of the customers. that is wearing very very thin. granted i only work with like 4 other people overnight, its not like its a whole bunch of people being lazy. god that would drive me crazy....fucking nuts. so anyway, i called up there today to see what my raise is going to be for going to overnights and i really think they are trying to bullshit me. they said they would call me back later and let me know after they discuss it. yea, sure. if they dont call back im going to come in tomorrow either a little before or after lunch and beat it out of them. well mabey not beat but they arent going to pay me 7.20 and hour for worign overnights when i KNOW for a fact that everyone else is making over 8 and i do way more than just about everyone put together. thats sad. but oh well, im there to make money not friends. and the better i do the better raises i will get when reviews roll around.

aiva is 2 months (8 weeks) today. we go to get her first round of shots on the 5th. im not looking forward to that. itll be alright tho. she started smiling alot...im mean ALOT. she is such a happy baby. and she talks to me too. its so adorable. i smile so hard sometimes when she does it it makes my cheeks hurt. shes a little constipated too because i started her on soy formula. so i had to get some glycerine suppositories from the doctor to help with that. boy thats so much fun, putting these things in her little butt. theyre really slippery so its kinda hard nto get them in there. and i have to use a rectal thermometer to hold them in there otherwise she pushes them out and i have to put them back in there. and the more you hold them the more slippery they get because they melt. oh the joy.

on another note my dad and i got into it last night. he thinks that i havent been doing enough around the house. gee thats a little hard when im working now...overnight....and taking care of aiva. i mean ive been so busy i barely have the time to do MY laundry and clean up MY messes...LET ALONE do the dishes or pick up the living room. i got SO mad at him and i still am. and the bad thing is that his birthday is today. and im so fucking pissed of at him that i dont even want to tell him happy birthday. my mom told me to let it go but i cant, i mean when he brings up shit like 'just be lucky you have me and mom to watch aiva while you work'...it makes me feel like a burden. how the hell am i supposed to react to that? am i supposed to forgive him even though he hasnt said sorry or anything? um, no. but i will say happy birthday tonight at dinner...but thats it. im not talking to him for a while...and if he talks to me im just gunna tell him to stop. hes being an ass. completely. he wants to ask me what im going to do when i move out...um, i have danny thanks. i talked to him last night and he even said that i could quit my job for all he cares. he said hed take up two jobs if i wanted to. but i said no because i want to work. i cant stand just staying home all day.

5 months until danny gets out. it seems so far away...but hes been away for 7 damn near. and i think about that and how it doesnt seem like it, i know it will fly by. i just cant think about it. i wouldnt have thought about it if he wouldnt have brought it up on the phone last night. but im on the downhill slope now and it wont be long before i can move out and not put up with my dads shit anymore. god that pissed me off.

well i think thats about it. oh i got my hair chopped off. its to my shoulders now just about. and i got my eyebrows done while i was at it. they look really good. ok well anyway im gunna go now...i have laundry to fold.

November 18th, 2005


ok so i went in for surgery on wednesday. i was really nervous. and they took me in and started an IV with some fluids to get me good and hydrated. i was so nervous you have no idea. i started feeling all sick to my stomach n stuff. so they lay me back until i walk to the OR. and so i climb on the table and im like please give me something for anxiety im so scared! and they were like 'oh we just did in your IV' and as soon as i hit the table i started BUSTING OUT LAUGHING for no apparent reason at all. i was like 'EWW MEH GAWD WHAT DID YOU JUST GIVE ME WHATS THE NAME OF IT?!' and they wouldnt tell me because they 'didnt want me trying to go find it'. (is that legal? to not tell u what theyre giving you?) anyway so they put a mask over my face and i ask them if that was going to put me to sleep and they were like 'no we already put that in your IV.' and thats the last thing i remember. it only took like two hours. i went in at like 715 and was home at like 11am. so i got home and clonked out for like 10 hours. and i think the anesthesia did something to my nervous system cuz i woke up like 5 times chewing on my tongue and it hurt! i have red spots on it now! anyway so they told me before my surgery that on the cat scan i had kidney stones on both sides so they were going to zap both sides. but they told my dad when i got out that they couldnt find any on my left side so they only did the right side. so i guess thats cool. and they said that in like two weeks i have to collect all of my pee...ALL OF IT for 24 hours. isnt that gross?! oh well anything to help prevent having kidney stones again...they suck ass.

ok so on to my day. my dad stayed with me this morning to help me with aiva cuz im on percocet and im tired. and my mom came home in the afternoon. so me and my mom went to the WIC office to pick up different checks because aiva is allregic to the formula the checks are for. then we went to walmart. i asked my mom if i could get a couple outfits. all ive been wearing since i had aiva is like pjs. and i dont want to wear pjs to thanksgiving and christmas. so i looked for jeans that fit me. i started with 9/10 and that was too small so i had to wear 11/12 :(. that was sad. ive never had to wear anything bigger than a 7. but its ok i know i wont be this size forever. it does feel good to have real clothes now. and i really dont look THAT fat wearing them so its all good.

so anyway i went to the bank after that and had to close out my savings account because i was running a little low on money in my checking account, because ive been away from work for 2 months now. and i have to pay my insurance next week so i just decided to do that and open it back up when i get a source of income again. it will be easy because i will have a higher pay for going to overnights. im excited for that :). so then i went home. my mom asked me if i would be mad if her, my dad and sister went to see chicken little. (it was my idea to go see it as a family because i want to go see it.) and i was like '......not really i guess......' and then i was like 'that was kinda a fib' and she said 'i can tell' but then she told me that me and my dad and sister could go if i wanted to. but that would make me feel bad so i said no. so instead they went and i went to the mall and walked. and i asked my mom if i could get my shoes early while i was there. so she said shed pay for $40. i got some that were $50 and she ended up reimbursing me for the whole $50 which i didnt really want. its just an early christmas present because my shoes that i had are like a year old and they smell bad. so i asked if i could have them as an early christmas present. oh and i also asked for one of those bangly purses with the sequins all over them. in baby or hot pink! oh yea!...lol andyway im gunna go i didnt realize that its like 11 now. im gunna go have a cig and go to bed. i might be back on later.

hey heather we should go see chicken little sometime! it might be a little hard to squeeze it in what with the holidays but i know we can fit in a few hours here or there. get back with me.

anyway im out. wow that was a long entry. go me!


new recipe...by meee!

1 tbsp. olive oil
1 tsp. italian seasoning
one large tortilla shell (burrito size)
pizza sauce
mozzarella cheese
peperroni (and whatever else you like on a pizza)

1. In a large skillet heat olive oil with italian seasoning (spread it out kind of evenly before you put the tortilla in it)
2. Cut totilla shell in half with a pizza cutter (or a knife works too)
3. In a plate cover one half of the tortilla shell with pizza sauce
4. Sprinkle mozzarella cheese over pizza sauce
5. Put toppings over cheese to your taste.
6. Sprinkle a tad bit more cheese over toppings.
7. Put the other half of the tortilla shell ontop.
8. Place the whole thing in the skillet until one side is browned.
9. Carefully (makes a mess sometimes, it takes a bit of practice) flip the quesedilla until the other side is browned and the chesse is melted.
10. Remove and let cool for a couple minutes

Ok, i came up with this by myself and im so proud of myself because i think its halfway decent and it tastes really good. If you have a really big appetite you can also use two tortilla shells and do a whole one instead of half. let me know how it is!! please pass this on its my first time sharing a recipe with people!

November 17th, 2005

*bites nails*

well its exactly 8 hours and 10 minutes before i get put out. im really scared. i cant eat solids anymore until i get out of surgery, i can only drink clear liquids until 5:15 am. but at least after this, hopefully, i will never have to experience kidney stones ever again. but with my family history, i am strongly predisposed to have them. i know it sounds funny to be predisposed to kidney stones, but kidney problems run in the family. a couple have almost died from it. and my grandma passed a kidney stone just a few weeks ago. i dunno something about them being shaped funny or whatever makes us more prone to have kidney stones.

on another note...i am planning my first few hours away from aiva now. i dont know how im going to react, but im sure she will be fine in the hands of my mom and dad. but im going with heather and her room mate to watch the wizard of oz to pink floyd's dark side of the moon. its gunna be kick ass. i cant wait. i went out and bought the cd for it today at slackers. i went there thinking they would have it used and i could get it cheap, but i was wrong. oh well.

oh man, the worst thing happened today. i went to my work (mc donalds on clark lane) and everyone told me that a regular customer had passed away. she was so sweet. she had just turned 81 this year. she always had a smile on her face and came in like every morning. her name was juanita. anyway, apparently she was in the steak n shake parking lot and fell backwards and cracked her head open. and she was on coumadin (which is a blood thinner) so she bled to death :(. it was so sad. so me and alot of my coworkers went to her visitation, and everyone knew who we were because her family was always with her when she came in. so not only did we know her but we knew alot of her family too. so anyway we get there, and her sister elizibeth informs us that their brother had a heart attack this morning when they arrived for the visitation this morning and passed away also. can u imagine dying at your sisters funeral? man...thats fucking depressing.

and also about my work, they got robbed a couple days ago. they pointed a gun to the general manager pam grahm and took money out of the safe. i knew about that before i went up there. but what is so fucking funny...and stupid as hell is that the guy who did it was staying at the motel RIGHT BEHIND mc donalds. what an idiot. anyway so yea he got caught. good...your a fucking dumbass anyway.

well thats about it. buh bye


November 15th, 2005

You scored as Sadistic Humour. Congratulations, you scored Sadistic Humour. You find the little things in life to be funny, and have a great sense of humour, whether it's stupid or dark. You're probably young, and older people don't understand why it's all so fucking hillarious. Either way, check out: Clerks, Mallrats, Napoleon Dynamite, Wayne's World.


Sadistic Humour


Romantic Comedy






Mindless Action Flick






Movie Recommendation.
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ok so i got the new mariah carey cd. i love it. i will not be ashamed.

went walkin at the mall...

i think aiva has an allergy to her formula.

thats about it...id elaborate but im tired.

November 14th, 2005

(no subject)

so alanis morissette did a new song...and i know its a remake, but i cant figure out who did the original. anyway, so the name is 'crazy'. and i hate it. its just not really like her. i think the majority of it is that it isnt original. and im used to her good writing abilities. *shrug* i just thought i might start off with that.

i got up and i cooked breakfast. i was gunna have an egg sandwich. but sandwich implies that you have bread. that i dont. :( i was dissapointed. so then i thought 'hey! french toast sounds good. and ooh! i can put cinnamon on it!' yea but the same thing applies. so i settled for scrambled eggs...and i put cheese on them.


well aivas awake buuh bye now

November 13th, 2005


so ive been thinking. what the hell am i gunna do if this fat doesnt go away? i debated saving up money for a liposuction. i know it sounds funny. but i seriously though about it. until i looked at the pricing anyway. id have to save up like 20Gs in order to get it done lol. so yea i guess thats out of the question. i just REALLY dont want to be fat. can u understand?

so anyway im missing the football game right now i was just eating an egg sandwich so i thought id write someting while i was eating.

November 12th, 2005


this is so frusterating. i am trying so hard to not go to not eating to loose weight. i have been walking at the mall recently. and i walked 6 laps today. which is like 6 miles i swear. and i weighed myself, i weigh like 2 pounds more than i did yesterday. argh im so angry. hopefully it shows up tomorrow. so ill weigh myself then and see if i lost any by then. if i dont start loosing weight quick im gunna go buy some hydroxycut or something. that shit works. my mom got some before and she let me take it and it made fat like melt off of me. but im trying to stay 'healthy'. you know? i really dont want to do it like i used to when i was in jr high. i dunno but im gunna go. my legs and hips hurt from walking so god damn much.



well i took my car to the shop to have shit looked over and it turns out that my exhaust manifold is cracked. great shit. so its a good thing my parents are paying for it. i dont know what im gunna do when i have to pay for this shit myself. i know i should have, but i really dont have the money to do it. they want my car to be good for winter and shit since i have alot riding on my tires with aiva on them now. so i think im gunna go to the mall and walk. i wish this ass would just melt off. but it wont unfortunately.

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